loki.roamz.

Day 3?

What day is it? I’m so confused. Set my phone to Cairo time, and I guess it’s wrong, cause we tried to get up for 7, ended up being 6, or something like that. Anyway, breakfast was amazing. I think the hummus here is made from angel baby crap, cause it looks like baby poo, but tastes like it’s from heaven. The coffee is STRONG, I’m flying off two cups. I’m getting used to this insanely nice hotel deal.

I have been told I have to wear pants today. Kinda feel like a fool for going bottomless the past day or so… I only brought one pair off long pants. I hope this isn’t a regular occurrence.

Steve ate some unlabeled shotglass off white creamy liquid. What else is new.

We loaded onto the bus to head to a mosque. Security failed to show up, who needs them anyway. We got to see some good old fashioned domestic violence on our ride, she fought back pretty well, I would have countered with an uppercut, as he left himself wide open after his follow through (gotta keep your guard up man, your makin us look bad as a sex!!)

Also, a gay guy on the back of a scooter blew me a kiss (I’m assuming he was gay, due to both of these facts). Glad to see they respect the aspects as Americans do pertaining to beauty here too.

If you havin mosque problems I feel bad for you son, I got 99 problems but Islam aint one, hit me!

Just checked out two historic mosques, very beautiful. Our tour guide gave us some back ground on the Muslim religion. I was unaware that it was started by Muhammad Ali before the Frasier fight. Makes sense, that fight was no joke. J/k, but really, I learned some cool stuff that will be great for trivia nights perhaps! Such as the story of abraham (not the dude with the sweet hat) and the hodge, and how it is a recreation of it. And also the 5 pilsners of the Muslim religion, bud, bud lite, bud light lime, bud ice, and skunked bud. J/k, again (one more and I’m on fire!) it wasn’t pilsners, it was pillars.

We had to take off our shoes, or wear booties. Good times.

At one of them, a sharply dressed dude, wearing a sweet beanie did what I am sure was some sort of Muslim version of lady gaga, and the echo was awesome, the reverb on the other hand was “meh”.

Now we are off to have lunch at a park, that used to be a landfill, but is now supposedly Cairo’s answer the the frog pond. Welp, it’s not like there are going to be more homeless people anyway… A little note, I hoped on the information superhighway last night and got off exit 12 for Wikipedia, and turned left down Cairo lane, and found out that this figgen place has over 6 million people running around! The metro area has over 20 million as of 2006, and it is the 4th largest city inthe world. Suck on that pitsburg.

So, park was unreal. Totally makes the commons in Boston look bush league. It was filled with elaborate gardens, and fountains connected by mini canals built in the walk ways. In one area there where dozens of young couples canoodling under the shade of trees, enjoying the panoramic view of the Cairo skyline, they all looked so in love, I think 4 people in our group vomited just ny looking at them gaze at eachother with nothing but a look of innocent romance. It was filthy. In another section there where scores preteens running about, splashing in fountains and having waaaay touch fun without video games, the Internet, or even tv. Not sure what was wrong with them. One even politely introduced himself in perfect English, and asked my name. So I told him. He proceeded by telling me his age, and welcomed me to Egypt. WTF? That us nor how kids act? Arnt they supposed to ve little shit heads? Anyway, we had lunch. Again, the food was tip notch, fresh hesh (naan like bread) babbaganosh hummus, ect was awesome just like the rest if the meal. Pretty much paradise. But, they only had non-alcoholic beer. Pfft.

So, we left, for some reason, pretty sure I could curled up under a tree and hung out for a bit. But any way, we’re headed to the hotel.

Traffic is intense. It’s interesting being up higher in the van with it’s big windows, you can easily look into other people’s cars. I noticed a few if the smarter people where sportin Audi logos on their non German cars. Again, people with great taste, clearly.

While we where stuck in traffic, Scarlett Johanson came up. I stated that she was dead to me due to the Sean Penn thing. Anyone else with me? Tainted, right? I mean, dudes cool, but… But, tainted.

I asked about gang violence. I was told it wasn’t bad, and that there are no parts of Cairo that “you just don’t go to” and that it is safe to walk the streets at 3am. And I completely believed our tour guide. (note: it us opposite day)

The little grafitti that saw was piss poor. Really lacking in flavot and style, but, I guess, my second language graffiti is lacking too. Still, I refuse to judge these Toys on a curve.

The air quality here is terrible, besides the constant dust, the smog has give LA a run for it’s money. I was told it’s because of all the diesel cars.

The dust is nuts. Every building is covered with it (outside) many of them are very nice, and would look that way after a good power washing or two at noon and again at 6pm.

Also, I saw a bum throw a rock at a man (im assuming) because he wouldn’t give him Money while we where stuck in traffic.

As we get back around the Nile, and our hotel, the streets (sidewalks, the streets are actually in really good shape) get less debris and rubble filled, and you start to see really lush vegetation. I asked if it was natural/native, and was told that it was. The jury is still out on this one, but I am an admited cynical Dickhead, so it could be true, and I would like it to be. But u guess even if it’s not, it’s still aesthetically awesome and visually titillating. (I typed tit, haha) editors note: I did not type tit bi typed a hodgepodge of letters that was close to titillating, and my phones auto correct fixed it, as I am sitting in a van in stop and go traffic.

Back at the hotel, we changed into our swim suits and chilled out at the pool. Amazing spot. There is an An Infiniti pool that makes it look like you are swimming in the Nile, which actualled scared the bejesus out of me., seeing as I am iffy about getting in the Charles river…

Great time. Non of the ladies joined us, so it was just a pool full of dude. Steve asked me if i would blog about it i said i would, the he asked me if i was going to blog about the conversation that we where having about me blogging , i said yes, and bow inhave happy steve? Wonderful. Afterword we showered up and met in the executive lounge, for free drinks and “mezza”, the middle eastern equivalent of tapas. It was awesome. A few of us got a little boozer up, and discussed the pluses and minuses of being able to turn water in wine, and weather we would rather turn the Nile into white or red wine. It I think the overall consensus was white.

After a nice log gabbing/drink session. We headed out to “Le Deck” a floating restaurant at our hotel. We sat around, got some more drinks some light food, some sheeshah. And more convo.

Then we headed up to the casino, where I spent a whopping 24 us dollars on roulette and slots. (one slot machine screwed out of 20 cents, I won’t forget this Egypt…) now it’s time for bed. Gotta be up in 5 hours for breakfast…

Tomorrow: camel riding, the great pyramids, a carpet school?( I think kids either make or ride special carpets. I’ve been told that it is a cultural connection. If it’s anything like that tacky show love reception, it should be interesting. ) after that we eat lunch. This should be good. Food here has yet to disappoint. Then we head back to our hotel, chill. Then dinner time, where we will have a hist family take us into their house, and cook us their food. I’m interested in this. Welp, night y’all.